How many women out there have been in a room, networking session, or meeting where the elusive topic of the work-life balance has been the subject of discussion. Most of us have left that room feeling just as confused if not more confused than when we first entered the room. So what is a work-life balance and can it really be achieved?
Work-life balance is viewed as the state of equilibrium where a person equally prioritizes the demands of one’s career and the demands of one’s personal life. As a mother, I know this is impossible and I know this is the reality for most mothers. Not only is it hard to balance being a new mum and work, but we have to face the stigma that comes with motherhood in the workplace. According to the American Journal of Sociology, there is what they call the motherhood penalty, whereby mothers face penalties in hiring, starting salaries, and perceived competence. This is due to the perception that mothers are 12.1% less committed to the job than women without children. As a result, the notion of work-life balance can be a challenge for mothers, and here is what we have found:
1. Work-life balance looks different for different women
There is no one-size-fits-all on the subject of work-life balance. Every woman's experience is unique and so are our responses to the events in our lives. What we perhaps need to spend more time doing is learning where our strengths lie and finding ways to make use of these in order to heighten our efficiencies in the workplace and home but also allow us to rest and have time to unwind and recharge. It is also essential that we begin to focus more as women on our individual skills and gifts, and abandon the constant comparison to men or to other women. Once we understand that we are enough, sufficient, and worthy as individuals we can better tackle our various responsibilities in a manner that prioritizes according to our preferences at different points in time.
2. Work-life balance can mean different things at different points in time
Achieving balance is not about ensuring equality all the time. Most of the time it is about moving things around to ensure needs are met at different points in time. This may mean sacrificing time to raise a newborn at one stage and missing out on networking dinners or sacrificing time to travel for work at another stage and missing a family function. A lot of women experience various levels of guilt in their lives as a consequence of making some of these difficult decisions. This is perfectly normal but what is important to remember is that you are doing your best, you have a support system that you can make use of in the form of friends, family, childminders, schools, etc, and that you are allowed to pursue your own goals and vision.
3.You are allowed to change your mind
Too often we believe that we are confined to the boxes created by our first choices. Stay-at-home mothers often feel stuck in that role and working mothers often feel unwelcome or unqualified to add value to the home. What is essential is to remember that nothing ties us to a particular role. There is nothing wrong with opting to spend more time with your family nor is there anything wrong with opting to work more for your family.
The reality is that whether you work from home, part-time, full-time, or have a flexible or rigid schedule, it will not be perfect. Somewhere along the line sacrifices will be made. Focus on identifying the best balance for you, that allows you to be fulfilled, well-rested and joyful. Don’t stop, rest, get support and keep going.
By Ratidzo Mutizwa & Ratidzo Makombe
留言